My Amas Veritas

My Amas Veritas

He should be able to make me laugh
When all I want to do is cry.
Indulge my love of penguins
And of Johnny Depp
Let me rant and moan about my troubles and strife,
Then hold my hand as I work them through.
Tell me to be quiet when, I start to ramble.
Share the dream of the future; the round house
In all its glory.
To love dancing in the rain, even better if it’s a storm.
Make perfect pancakes, and own a VW Campervan (1967)
Tell me I’m beautiful but not too often.
Promise me forever.

21/7/2010

2 halves

Days and nights
two aides of mother earth
as human as me

I am torn in two
I am fluid and relaxed
yet I change
Stubborn and angry

90 years ago

90 years have passed but the world has not learnt the lesson.
With so many years of war and strife
Tears and heart ache,
The years of death.

Seeing the last veterans today
I felt pride
Like I’ve never felt before
Those men are heroes
They deserve a deep respect from people all around the world
I know for one they have my deep thanks,
But nothing covers the debt.

I wonder when current world events end
Will the men and women get the same respect?
With all my heart I hope they do.

12/11/2009

Do you ever talk to the stars?
Send wishes to distant galaxies
Do you ever hope that the moon can hear your thoughts?
To take that dream you carry in your heart
And make it come true.

Do you wish that the one for you
Knows that you are sleepless this night
Can hear your hearts desire
And can feel the pain of loneliness you carry
Do you…

Do you hope that the one for you
Would tell you they love you
Show you that they care
And promise they will love you forever
Do you…

Do you dream of this person?
Wishing, hoping, yearning
They will come into your life
And take you away from the despair
Do you…

April 2008

Its my time

Its my time
I have started to grow again
I refuse to be a lapdog
I am not to be used or ignored
I have my friends and my family
I don’t know where I’m going
To be honest, I don’t care

Coming out of a month of uncertainty
Time feels like it is now moving again
I can feel myself release the old life
Saying goodbye to that part of myself
I like this feeling of peace

The tears have stopped
Loneliness is still there but I think it always will
Feeling free in myself
Something I wouldn’t trade with anyone

My life has begun again

June 2010

Endless white stones

The endless rows of white stones

Towering lists of names carved into time

A central memorial

Looks out over green fields

A blank stone with 4 lonely words

‘Known only unto god’

A family without closure

A soul with no name

It’s hard to think that the battlefields of France and Belgium

Are now lush farmland

The horrors of war

Merely ploughed away

I have never seen these sights

It would break my heart to do so

Just hearing the tales that come from the trenches

Makes my blood run cold

You 1+2

You 1

When I think of you I feel no hatred or anger,

When I think of you I see no future

Only a long past

When I think of you I know I done what I had to

What was necessary for me.

When I think of you I can’t get mad

It’s not something I’m proud about.

I don’t like to cause pain

When I think of you I feel nothing

A numbness filling my soul

You 2

When I think of you I feel angry

When I think of you I feel a shadow of an feeling

When I think of you I feel used, old.

You will probably never know how much

You have hurt me over the years

Yet never know how much I could love you

Part of me wants to cause pain

I can’t do that

I hope it is a long time before I look upon your face again

One day we will be able to be a friend to each other.

June 2010